Dating and Dickpics: Episode 4

It’s been a long time coming! I apologise for the severe lack of dating mishaps on my part; I have been swamped with work and other stuff, such as my brother’s wedding (which was pretty epic).

This episode brings a mark of change. For once, there’s more dating and less dickpics. Well, perhaps not dating, but less fuckboy antics.

Less bad behaviour by boys makes me happy

Less bad behaviour by boys makes me happy

So as I mentioned, I went to my brother’s wedding in Italy. I actually ended up travelling the whole day on my birthday so we didn’t really celebrate, although the airline did provide us with champagne during the flight and the hotel we were staying at made us a cake. Anyway, I wasn’t at home with my best friends so I decided to celebrate the day after landing back in London.

Naturally, me and my best friend decided on going clubbing as it’s a common pastime of ours.

Salsa! in London, our favourite haunt

Salsa! in London, our favourite haunt

We headed to our usual spot. The only problem? We were both completely sober when we walked in at around 11pm. My best friend had just gotten off her shift at work and I just hadn’t gotten round to predrinking. We decided to order some cocktails and sit down until we felt the alcohol flowing through our veins. We had to swat off endless amounts of creepy guys whilst we were downing our drink. One middle-aged guy actually took to following my best friend around the night club until I told him where to go.

Whilst we were nursing some drinks at our table, a guy approached us. Immediately, I reckoned he had approached us because he was looking to get in our good books. He introduced himself and didn’t invade our space like the other blokes that night had. I wasn’t attracted to him, though. Physically, he wasn’t my type.

Maluma. Maluma is my type.

Maluma. Maluma is my type.

He wasn’t creepy or particularly threatening like the other guys who had approached us all night so we started talking to him. He was a pretty interesting guy, very funny and well-spoken. I was already starting to like him. He had great ideas and opinions about a range of topics. After staying with us for one drink, he returned to his friends in the VIP area but told us he’d be back to come and chat to us. Sure enough, he did. He bought us drinks and shots whilst we talked some more and then he invited us to the VIP area where me and him really got talking. We struck a really good rapport and something strange happened. Suddenly I was quite attracted to him. Now I’ll admit that I’m very shallow when it comes to liking guys, but I’d spoken to him a lot that night and he just had such a sparkling personality. Sure enough, we kissed. I was just really infatuated with his personality which is something that has never happened before.

Pucker up

Pucker up

We stayed together for the rest of the night until it was time for us to part ways. He tried his best to convince me to go to the after party but I knew it wouldn’t be worth it — I was tired and just wanted to crash on my best friend’s sofa for the night. We exchanged numbers and said goodbye. In less than 10 minutes he rang me to make sure me and my best friend had gotten a taxi okay, which was a very sweet gesture.

We texted pretty much every day since that night for about a week until I decided to delve a little further. After some basic Facebook stalking, I discovered the shocking truth: he was 35.

35.

Bearing in mind I’m only 22, I was pretty freaked out. He didn’t look or act 35 when I met him; I’d assumed he was like 31 at the most. I mean, he’s closer to 40 than 20. He had asked me out on a date but I decided that it was best to nip it in the bud before anything could get out of control on his part. We do text here and there but it’s the basics, like ‘how was your weekend’ etc.

The only mid-30s guy I'd date

The only mid-30s guy I’d date

There is another guy, however. He’s only recently come on the scene. I like him. He’s funny, sweet and he has this whole other sexy side to him which I really didn’t expect. He’s cute as hell. It’s early days yet so I can’t really comment any further. It might just be a flash in the pan, or it might go somewhere. At least he doesn’t think I’m a potato.

And finally, some general points:

  • Someone sent me explicit images via Facebook despite my protestations. I posted it in a public post on Facebook. They took down my post but didn’t suspend the guy’s account or anything. Sexism much? Why was it okay for him to send me those things but when I name and shame, I’m slammed for it?
  • I met Olivier Giroud at work. Solid 10/10. Bit rude but very handsome in real life.
  • I also met Alfie Allen AKA Theon Greyjoy/Reek from Game of Thrones. He’s really tiny in real life. I’m almost certain he’s shorter than me.
  • I’m really sick of people fetishising women of colour.
  • Does Malik think he’s going to get far with lines like ‘provide you sex and happy life if marry’? Who are these randoms on Twitter?
No but srsly, wtf

No but srsly, wtf


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Tonight…We’re Drinking from the Bottle!

Shots shots shots shots shots shots EVERYBODY!! Who doesn’t love a good bit of alcohol? Unfortunately, the government has announced its plan to introduce warning labels on bottles of alcohol, similar to those found on cigarette packets, in a bid to warn people of the health implications that drinking could possibly cause. However, I think the government is doing more harm than good by even contemplating such a strategy.

It’s not as if anyone goes into drinking blindly. From a young age, we’re taught that drinking and smoking have serious consequences later in life and that if you drink too much alcohol in one go, you could potentially die. The onus is on us to make our own decision about how we socialise and the impact it may have on our health. We shouldn’t be living in a nanny state with a moral code that guilts us into not enjoying a little treat here and there.

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Of course there are far wider implications on alcoholics. I partially believe that the government’s push for these health warnings is to dissuade people from trying alcohol because of the danger of alcoholism. Although the government has good intentions – or so it seems – people will always try things they are told they shouldn’t. The temptation of the forbidden or frowned upon is seductive and it’s one that very few can resist. Being made to feel guilty because of alcohol consumption is not what the government is for. That is entirely down to the person who has had a drink (or a few).

Another point to contemplate is that the majority of people go to clubs or bars to drink. The health warnings are only put on bottles and realistically, in a dark club, you are not going to be able to see the health warnings if you’re on the other side of the bar. Bartending is a stressful and fast-paced job and bartenders barely have the time to shout you the price of your drink – they are not going to give you a drink and tell you what the warning on the bottle says. So really, drinking is still going to happen and arguably, the worst kind of drinking is going to continue – binge drinking. Binge drinking has been proven to be dangerous and detrimental to one’s wellbeing but if drinkers are put off by warnings they can visibly see in the supermarket, surely they will consume more alcohol in clubs and bars where the reminder of the damage to their health is hidden.

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For argument’s sake, let’s say that consumers do take note of the health warnings and suddenly, alcohol sales drop dramatically. Has the government thought about the economic consequences that a decrease in alcohol sales would have? Much like petrol, the majority of the money that we pay for alcohol is actually tax. We can speculate about what the government does with that tax money but inevitably, the country as a whole would suffer. Inflation would increase because taxes would have to be generated to cover the deficit caused by a lack of tax from alcohol sales.

Even if this silly notion is introduced, people will become apathetic towards the warnings. Last year, I had a rather stressful job and took up smoking for the first time in my life, despite having many lessons in secondary school about the dangers. The first packet I bought had an off-putting picture of someone with damaged gums as a result of smoking. I regarded it for all of two seconds, went outside and smoked three cigarettes consecutively. There is so much propaganda, on cigarette cartons, television and radio, that people have actually stopped caring. We are bombarded with information about how dangerous legal drugs such as tobacco and alcohol can be and we simply don’t care. Constant exposure to such dramatic, sometimes over-exaggerated, hype just generates apathy to the point that people stop being shocked and simply regard the warnings as another part of the packaging, not even acknowledging them.

jager

I don’t doubt that the introduction of health warnings on alcohol packaging will come at a cost to the public and to the consumer. To modify the packaging, I wouldn’t be surprised if the public are somehow punished for it; most likely, the cost of alcohol will rise.

Personally, I feel that putting health warnings on alcohol will not achieve anything. Very few people will be deterred. Drinking is a social past-time of many and it brings people together. It is seen as a way to relax or to celebrate and generally gives people a bit of a buzz. Yes, there are health problems associated with drinking, but the decision should be left to the consumer, not the government. The government seems to think that it can try and dictate, guilt and be a moral beacon for the public. We should be left to make our own choices without aesthetically displeasing warnings tarnishing bottles of booze.